i want things to be back the way they were before. i want things to be simple again.

one week left in sydney, and i really shouldn't be surprised that i feel that i have achieved nothing this visit.

birthday was much fun, although the night before i got so incredibly drunk with people whom are practically strangers so i felt really weird afterwards. and sick. i workshopped my poem with my creative writing class in the morning, which was really hard because i kept wanting to go and throw up. the feedback was good, but i'm sick of "good" feedback. i really want people to tell me how to make it better, because to me it still looks like absolute shit. i think the problem is that i hate myself for being too safe with my work, y'know? as if i can do something and do it competently without taking risks. i want to take risks and i want to fail from time to time. fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck. i am writing a new play though, which makes me happy. the word fuck appears three times in the first minute, it has no characters, there is no plot and it has no setting. i think it's going to be the piece of work i am most proud of, regardless of whether or not if its a piece of shit. at least i know that i have broken out of this fucking pathetic mould, and have tried something NEW for once.

funny. i thought this entry was supposed to be about my birthday?

p.s. i am coming home in july for two weeks, co-inciding with sydney uni's holidays and with school holidays, so my rents will be home. i look forward to catching up with some of you :)

Inaugural entry from Melbourne. The whole thing has been a very strange, very eye-opening but ultimately worthwile experience. That being said, I have only really been here for a week and a half, and on my own for just a week. The share house is brilliant and the people in it are very nice, very likeable people. Work at Myer has proved to be rather more bitchy than I previously envisaged that it would, and I am having doubts about where or not I will be able to earn enough to earn Youth Allowance for 2007. Otherwise, things are great, and I am looking forward to starting classes next week. Not being 18 kind of sucks. Friend making is going well, and other assorted funs are happening. I can't say that I'm feeling particularly homesick yet, but the truth is that it's only been a week ans I am likely to change a lot in how I feel before I get really "settled" here. So, yeah. I'll write again soon. Hope all of you are enjoying your lives, as much as possible at least.